A couple of weeks ago I had my very first award experience. Until then I was an award virgin and I had never really thought about them, let alone considered the fact that I would ever receive one. I was overwhelmed with all sorts of mixed emotions. First of all, I was incredibly flattered and really appreciated the gesture, which came from a wonderful fellow blogger that I really liked. Who doesn't want to be commended for their efforts in blogland? I am still finding my way in the blogosphere so anything positive anybody has to say about me is really good for my ego and inspires me to do more posts.
So, where is this award, you may wonder. Well, here's the thing: I politely refused. I felt really guilty about it, even though the giver took it like a champion. The thing is: awards come with strings attached and I have never liked praise that comes with a price, if you know what I mean. In order to receive my award I in turn would have to pass it on to a couple of other bloggers and so forth and so forth. Of course I know this is the way it works in the wonderful world of blogs, but it's not how it works in my world. In my world praise is free, compliments are given without conditions and when I scratch your back I would like it if you said thank you, but you need not necessarily scratch mine.
I have no idea if anybody else is ever going to feel the need to give me an award again, but just in case someone felt an incling I promised the generous giver of my first one that I would post a little note on my sidebar about it, so I wouldn't have to feel guilty over refusing other awards and nobody else would ever be tempted to give me one in the first place. It took me a few weeks, but I made a little picture that says 'award free zone', so people know in advance that I don't 'do' awards.
Actually I am almost seriously considering starting the no-strings-attached-award or something like that, where you get to be praised to kingdom come and don't have to do anything in return! Wouldn't that be cool? I don't know if such an award would have any status to the receiver, especially if it came from me, but the idea behind it really speaks to me. Well, that's something to ponder for the future maybe...;-)
Finally I want to say that I really appreciate all the comments I get both here and on flickr, yahoo groups or just through my private mail. I can't tell you enough how all of them make my day. I love it that people take the time to read my blog, watch my artsy stuff and then even consider it worth their while to say something about it to me. So in case it wasn't clear already: thank you thank you thank you ;-)